Tag poet

Journal Entry # 2*

europaskiwi Leave a comment 
I'm changing the narrative;
attaining all that is provided, so I can 
produce clearer reactions to give

manufacturing better habits, 
so change can be less difficult;
no longer pointing fingers at those who aren't
at fault

clean and fragrant vibrations keeps me 
motivated; pushing my space to productive
and cultivated

not saying I know where this truly going; though,
when it's clear, only then, will I embrace the moment

Journal Entry # 1*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

today, I took my time;

every thing went as scheduled, without running behind

moving at a steady pace;

making calculated moves to make sure I’m being safe

I yield to sketchy roads;

embracing the need to live, its not time for my being to go cold

making note to every pro, and con;

connecting only to happiness as true bond

searching for different avenues to manifest my necessities;

exerting myself into this kind of lifestyle by all means

un-Synchronized*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

being struck in the brain with sudden decisions, gives me chills – to know I went through stuff I rather not spill; boy! I am truly gifted – anointed and chosen, I’m handling these blessings with precision, cherishing every moment;

often I’m afraid of losing my touch, knowing I embody the feeling; being myself never been so appealing; I’ve never asked for much; when will “whatever” be an actual endeavor? I want more than to be apart of a flock, of one feather;

the only subject that I bond with is my mind; with one other, that happens to be time – though, many realities are happening, yet, time hasn’t moved a bit! I can see these facets a mile away, running toward circumstance, because I just want to get it over with; I’ve never been the type to go astray;

jumping into overwhelming appointments – knowing I shouldn’t be so impulsive; trying to plan out my life making it a goal to be compulsive; I don’t know how to respond as I watch many sides of me – made it hard to be calm;

and in that moment, I found a new peace- for now on even when affairs aren’t pretty, I must always have the courage to speak!

I’m melting away all my fears, as I continue to look sternly in the mirror; In my heart I know eventually my sight will be clearer…

S/o*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

following a melodic tone

feeling the sensitive flow of its moan

the vibrations of its falsetto rubs me all the right ways,

using music to explain what it is I’m trying to say

I’m a hopeless romantic

though, I do not fall vulnerable to misleading antics

the soothing sound of love pulls me into a trance

generating thoughts by talking through this dance

I’m spoiling myself with a few classics,

music to my ears, to me, is everlasting

ventilation*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

Having more than sight is a totality living in this world, in this I don’t intend to rhyme because it isn’t something to play with; it’s just in me to say I  really don’t want to take the time out to think about what goes with what word – you know. I know for myself, personally if It’s meant to come out that way, so be it. I paint pictures for you to truly understand the shoes I fill; it may seem mediocre to the next person, looking at only the quality or the condition of its shell, but I stand in the rawness that’s living on the inside. You truly don’t know; this is fine though, this isn’t your obligation. Your main priority is to deal with you; be for you first. Being last hasn’t really shown it’s  best rewards, it’s almost giving the blessing God intended for you – to someone else.

That’s almost regifting something that was and is priceless, authentic, personalized just for you. How is that fair for you? You is really I, who happens to be me. Something I had to give up was my weakness to guilt; allowing people that should care about me, take full advantage for self-perseverance purposes. Shaking my head in real life – how can a pure heart do that; It doesn’t. Giving isn’t always good nor healthy; decisions are purposeful. The same way I may be picky with my food or even my men; why not be this way about my whole life. This seem to be the best way to live if I don’t just want to exist. Can I get a witness If you agree! Been waiting for this moment, to be free like this in the “comfort” of my own home. Bunny ears because being home isn’t always comfortable – I mean can I be real right now huh?  Just wanting to put it all out there doesn’t feel like such a bad idea depending on the choice of conversation.

Topics would be the formal word for those that laugh at the face of my format. Not realizing it was a poker face or cover page – you understand? No? Ok – check it, I mostly talk how I write, and it’s somewhat professional with a splash of hoodlum ha-ha! ultimately I call it just being me. People still look at me like a circus act though, and it’s cool. The joke is on them when they see how business is really handled. Then the respect is abundant. I’ll be clear, may I add – I don’t force it, if you love it, great. If you don’t, there’s always doors to walk through. The same way you walked in, you can walk out.

commence*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

Life as we know it, is so precious; we forget to think about things like that. Seeing my growth before my eyes in certain areas is really a humbling feeling. Thank God for time and chance; with each day I’m blessed with an opportunity to learn from my mistakes I made yesterday, and try again – hence, another chance.

The saying is you only have one life to live; in my opinion, I believe each day The Lord bless’ us with another is another advantage at life and so far the Lord been waking me up for 28 years and counting! I have many flaws, yet I’m very ok with that; I’m saying Hallelujah anyhow! Why? I say this because it is well; even with what “looks” like a low time in my life, there’s light at the end of this storm – sunshine if you want to get technical.

See, when you find yourself in a place where your faith begins to evolve in the unconscious mind and heart, you no longer look at what’s in front of you. I have vision, not just sight – a vision has no obligation to look back, but what’s in front of me, and beyond – just sitting here composing this passage, gives me more correspondence to what going on in a whole – everything is connected. I’m blessed to have an avenue where I am able to have this kind of breakthrough at the age I am.

God is so good, and his grace and mercy never stops! Knowing what I know now, the only thing I would take back are the moments where I should’ve just took a moment, and tell myself STOP. Yet, I am deeply grateful that I went through the things I did; painful and scaring moments, became healed wounds for a testimony and growth in my life as the woman I am to this day. I pray to myself everyday, that pass the flesh I’m in, he is still pleased with my heart.  

bridge*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

Walking by faith is the most healthiest thing you can do. Faith is when you allow the Lord to take over all milestones in your life – good or bad.

Simple, YET it can be so complicated, and this can be said from experience. Whether it seem like I’m babbling or not, this was in my spirit to put down. Life is so hard, having front row seats to that can bring a lot of emotions and feelings that are sometimes unexplained.

Things unknown are mostly for the best in my opinion. As bad as I would like to know every single thing, I’ve realized that it’s better not to know all the time. Doors that can regrettably be open are the hardest ones to close back.  

unto me*

europaskiwi Leave a comment

I am positioning my thoughts on paper, exploring my mind with help from my savior…

there’s a specific mentality I want to maintain, doing my best not to make the same mistakes again…

overwhelmed by the lack of faith, but doing above and beyond for my peace sake – no more, will I walk eggshells as if my life is at stake; the spiritual things I’m sensing will eventually take it’s rightful place…