Tag journaling

blowhard*

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a very boastful and talkative person

Meriam-Webster

being patient is like allowing life just to happen. I have realized that there are things you really can’t manipulate, and that’s ok. when the inevitable get’s involved, know that what was for you – would be yours anyhow; you are obligated to all your blessings no matter how long it takes to receive them.

time is what it is; though we try to get ahead of it; even times where we can actually make that happen, we don’t realize it until we get behind again. rambling on – but this is sensible stuff, no pulling wisdom out of thin air, just using the gift of common sense to apply better awareness…

Stop allowing the anxiety of opportunity get the best of you; there are many ways to see things in a better view. appointed to things you may not think you deserve; can turn negativity into a positive curve – even though having front row seats to so many problems can work on your nerves. that’s fine, it’s natural; we all will have our day, and that’s factual!

Fail At Losing

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I want to fail at losing; so that winning will prevail…

Europa

I wish to not miss things in the past; it’s over now, and it’s why it didn’t last. I want to grow in seasons, instead of growing only on certain evenings; I’ll later clarify and then, you’ll understand the meaning.

My progression can take time; the journey feel hard, but the journey is mine. Comprehending every step I take with precision; making sure the choices I make is the right decision.

Longing for enlightenment towards my future; the gift of discernment I’ll soon receive will feel more than super! I have days where I don’t feel that I’ve learned nothing; hence, only in the evening, when the day’s done is when I’m on to something…. I don’t want to be too late; only my decisions is what makes my fate.

No longer allowing time to pass; but being ahead of time will give me plenty of mass. After thoughts are intriguing; the last minute will not be my growth anymore, I will understand soon pass my evenings…

forgiveness for me*

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I’m amused at the things I choose to love, and stress about; mindlessly naïve to what I should’ve given doubt. I’m frazzled with thoughts I’ve constantly brainstormed; coming to an understanding that there’s a certain way to perform.

I am moving very steady; making preparations to be ready. whatever may come, I want to fully be whole for my blessing; my first reaction will be to many, quite an impression. I’ve been working on changeable flaws; I don’t bother listing them, it would sound like a drawn out clause.

I truly want to be a better person daily; given with support I hold tight to, can only be family. What’s insane, is they’re worst than strangers; though, it’s safe to say at least we can understand each others anger…

ebullience*

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I’m sharpening my skills I haven’t yet executed; I’m becoming stronger and no longer feeling persecuted. walking in my shoes has taken a tole; running, jumping, NEVER walking, I’m always ruining my soles.

benefiting from hurt is a serious level of reaping; stay close, I haven’t went left, but I tend to be right when I’m speaking…

those that show consistency, only do when it profits selfish satisfactions; my mind is what truly represents my benefaction; yet, I’m made to always feel as if I’m nothing more than a small diffraction.

love me, not my flesh; cherish my spirit, without distress, allow ourselves to genuinely mesh. I will not beg for understanding and intimacy to be vested; never again will I allow my heart to feel detested…

Qi*

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I have a story that would blow your mind; it could take awhile, so I hope you have time…

building a cornerstone that’ll create a new past; pushing back the bad dwellings with the good and vast. as a teen I portrayed the life of an adult; when it was time to act my age, I didn’t know how, and that’s not my fault.

influences can extend a huge impact; those who are elder to me had plans to enact. adolescent and naïve to what was really right and really wrong; being in that position can also come with rebellion, while being headstrong.

with such responsibility at a stage during puberty, while I’m fighting demons to get far from a toxic continuity; I’m turning it all around, once I’ve crossed over the abyss; I’ll finally have something else to reminisce…

uttermost*

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far away from here sounds like a figment; the way things have been going, it doesn’t sound like a bad commitment. I wanna be where only stars brighten my night, while sunshine illuminates my day; I wanna get lost in a conception of felicity, grasping every aspect of this phase.

no longer living with a mindset of life feeling often naught; neutralizing any wickedness that may try to overcast any dream I’ve sought. appeasing to idealize an existence of purity and its nourishments; some days I wish for evil there would be a special law to banish it, with the communities full encouragement.

I aspire for genuine admiration to cleanse my mind of the thought of it being improbable; free of naivety in knowing that nothing is truly impossible. my feet are grounded to the earth and my mind and is centralized in faith; for this figment I revered is closer than far away…

frail*

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uncomfortable with the way my life is currently conditioned; even if i fall again, I’ll my best to sustain my ambition.

any figure of speech can be dangerous used in the wrong manner; as powerful as words can be, I make it my business to speak with candor.

I want to be the one counted for first; give me unconditional security! I want to break this generational curse; show me love in it’s fullest purity!

I pray when it’s bad or good; God will always know my heart and with him, I’ll never be misunderstood.

perplexed*

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I am suffering from an emotion of pain that’s never paved my heart before. the more I think about the intimacy that resulted in emptiness, makes its especially sore.

funny how worlds can collide; feelings ruptures within, hiding the pain inside. what do you say to a person that you thought would love you back? the words to say has taken a hiatus, I just want to be emotionally detached!

I keep shutting down to keep from saying permanent words; making sure that everything I say is deduced to everything you deserve.

it just sucks when life makes you realize somethings you may want, is a hard no; the next lesson I believe I need to learn, is how to just let things go…

I am rattled with emotions; idle thoughts about God knows what – I must maintain my focus…